OverFUCKINGwhelmed

The last 72 hours have been FUCKIN CRAZY!
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I’m so sorry for that but I just needed to get it out.
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When I left my office Friday, my niece wanted to have a girl’s night so she spent the night with me. We watched Homecoming & danced in my living room until she fell asleep around 11pm. After than I hopped on my laptop until 5am. Woke up around 9 to get our day started. I had a ton of stuff to do with my client that day bc she leaves this weekend going to Gulf Shores so we had to go shopping & get her squared away. I decided then I wouldn’t leave my house at all on Sunday because I needed to work on my final— a 10-12 page research paper with 10 APA citations & quantitative data that I had to analyze from the SurveyMonkey that many of you kindly attributed to.
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By the time Sunday afternoon was here, I texted my boss that I was in the middle of an actual psychological crisis & that I needed a personal day. To be honest, a lot of that stress was coming from the excuse that I was debating using to call in on a Monday morning. When I thought about it, I figured she’d appreciate the truth much rather than the lie I was trying to conjure up.
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My plan Sunday morning was to sit down @ my computer & write. It was 10 o’clock a.m. Then, in the blink of an eye, it was literally 10 o’clock p.m. when I wrote the first sentence. So I sat there & wrote. I wrote & I panicked. And then I wrote some more. I was still writing when my alarm went off on my phone @ 5:30 that morning & I was only up to page 5. At 6 am, I got in the bed.
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By 9, I was back up writing. I had to get this shit done today because I still had class last night @ 6 for which I had to present a totally different paper on & I still needed to go over that presentation. I texted my mother. And even though I didn’t tell her I was panicking, she already knew. “Do you want me to come by,” she asked. NO! is what I wanted to say, but I replied, “No, you don’t have to come by here. I appreciate it. Just going to try & finish up.” She came by anyway. And I appreciated it.
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By this point, it was 4:30 in the afternoon. I’d thrown a quick PowerPoint presentation together just so I could remember what the hell I was going to be speaking to about @ 6. I hopped in the shower, smashed my face real cute, put on a pair of heels & ran out the door.

I ended up killing my presentation. Last night, I got back home around 10pm. I stopped at the Walgreens to get some Z-quil because even though my body was exhausted, I still had so much anxiety, I was afraid I wouldn’t rest.
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I’ve got a 1 o’clock confernce call regarding a 3rd research project that I’ve been working on this year & I have to have the paper that sent me into a spiral also due, printed out & delivered in person by 5.
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I said all of this to explain my absence in the my blog these past few days. Normally, I schedule my texts for the week on Sundays so I have content for you guys. I know I’m not on this HUGE platform (yet), I do realize & see the growth & engagement from you guys & I appreciate it. And I love finding, creating & sharing with all of you.
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With that said, I’m going to take the rest of the day off from social media (lol), posting anyway, but I’ll be going through & trying to engage as much as I can. Thanks My Loves!
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TheRealBlackCarrieBradshaw

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