25 Things I’ve Learned From My Failed Relationships

Letting go of someone is hard, but so is holding on. And sometimes the pain you feel is so great that you feel like you might literally die of a broken heart. The good news is, a breakup can be one of the best moments for self-reflection and improvement. Personally, I’ve had my fair share of loss, but I’ve learned that sometimes what we think is love, is actually a lesson.

Here are 25 lessons I’ve learned.

  1. There will never come a time when a man cares about you so much that he goes days without calling you.  
  2. The best way to get revenge is to be genuinely happy, healed, and unfuckingbothered.
  3. If he only wants a piece of you, then don’t give him the peace of you.  
  4. It’s okay if you don’t know how to move on, try something easy like not going back.
  5. When they fail at replacing you, they start looking for you again. Don’t fall for that shit.

I’m really working on myself these days because I’m wise enough to admit that sometimes in my relationships, the problem was me.

TheRealBlackCarrieBradshaw
6. When I say I hate you what I really mean is I’m hurting so badly from the love I gave to you & hate is the only word strong enough to express the emotion I feel. I don’t hate you. I hate feeling this way. And maybe I hate myself for ever loving you.
7. It’s okay if you still love them. Some people are meant to stay in your heart, not in your life.
8. I can’t even afford to give a fuck, anymore.  
9. One thing that hasn’t failed me yet is my intuition.
10. Every man want s a good woman until she requires him to be a good man.  
11. Sex is cool and all but it means more when the person is actually deserving of your body, your time, and your heart. 
12. I didn’t cut you off though. You cut yourself on when you did what you did. 
13. One woman’s I don’t want him is another woman’s I don’t either, Sis.
14. I know it hurts but you gotta let that hurt go so somebody else can love you. This is easier said than done and it’s going to take some time, but I’m definitely working on it.  
15. Every time you take them back, you’re subconsciously telling them you’re okay with their behavior. You’re probably thinking, “No ma’am. In fact, I tell them they MUST change their behavior if they want to keep me.” And therein lies the problem. If you take him back before he changes his behavior then he has nothing to work towards.
16. They will always, Always, ALWAYS try to come back.
17. You have to meet people where they are. And sometimes, you have to leave them there, too.
18. Now that I think about it, I didn’t really like my ex. I loved him… but I didn’t really like his ass.
19. Maybe it’s not the person that let you down. Maybe it’s the expectation of what you wanted them to be.
20. Not all breakups are bad. Some of them are necessary.
21. It’s one thing when you have to act like you don’t GAF but it different when you actually don’t GAF anymore.
22. I’d rather be single than unappreciated
23. Stay away from toxic people. You know the ones who won’t leave you alone but won’t treat you right, either. Yeah.  
24. I still got love for you. I just lost respect for you.  
25. Sometimes we feel like our loyalty will change a person’s mind. It doesn’t. [Excerpt from my book, Ghosts of Love Lives Past]  
26. I know I’m a lot to handle, but I’m also a lot to lose.

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  1. Pingback: 9 Things I Learnt From My Failed Relationships - Weird & Liberated

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