Am I open to love again?
Yes. Absolutely. I love falling in love. It feels so good. And if what I felt with him could feel that good & it wasn’t real just imagine how good it will feel when it is The Real Thing.
I’m not sure if what I felt, what I had with him… what we had together was love. It felt like it. It even sounded like it. Maybe it was love. Maybe it was PASSION. Maybe it was what I suspected all along but never wanted to admit. Maybe it was lust cleverly disguised as The Real Thing. I think we cared about each other deeply. I think it was love, in the moments when we called it love.
It could’ve been love. I really wanted it to be, but maybe it wasn’t The Real Thing. I have to believe there are many levels & different stages of love. But The Real Thing is so good that there’s no way someone in their right mind would just let that go. When it’s The Real Thing, you’ll be enough- for the right person.
I hate to say I dodged a bullet with him because I don’t want to make it seem like I’m now trying to find reasons to make him be a bad guy. But I will say this, God always knows what he’s doing. And while we don’t understand His reasoning or His Timing, I believe that God allows certain things to happen for an intended purpose.
I don’t wanna be sad anymore. I wanna be happy that I’m one step closer to The Real Thing. I wanna be thankful for the lessons I’ve learned & the misfortune that I quite possibly avoided in this relationship.