Maybe…You’re Your OWN Soulmate

For years, hopeless romantics have fawned over the fairytale of finding their soulmate. It’s the novice idea that there is, in fact, one person that is designed specifically for us to spend our lives with. I’ve written about this before, posing the question of more than one soulmate. And for good reason. 

I’ve also shared my views on soulmates here on my blog, in the past, mulling over the idea of whether or not you’re allowed more than one. In my book, Ghosts of Love Lives Past, I shared the heart wrenching story of my lover’s unexpected death, which led me to wonder whether or not you were allowed more than one soulmate in a lifetime.

I asked people in a Facebook post and this is what they had to say:

“Yes, spirits evolve and change. I believe it is possible to realign ourselves with a different soulmate as we do so.”

“Yes. They come in many forms”

“Yes, and they don’t all have to be lovers. Many of them are good friends, family, long-term associates, etc….”

“Yes I married my 1st and when he passed away God sent me another one”

One contributor added, “There are 3 people you encounter in life. Kindred Spirits, Soulmates, and lastly your twin flame. Kindred spirits are people you vibe with, like minded but they may not be around long term. You can have many soulmates, friends, family, coworkers etc. These are people who stay around for the long run, but it’s not always for a lifetime. The true goal is finding your twin flame, that’s the one person meant for you.”

And while the response to the question of whether or not we are allowed more than one soulmate was a resounding YES, I couldn’t help but wonder something else. What if your soulmate is actually… you?

Think about it. Are you someone who actually enjoys your own company? How many times have you treated yourself to a solo date or even bought yourself something nice, whether it was a sexy bra and panty set or a bouquet of fresh flowers (both of which I’ve done). How many times have you felt alone and no one but your own INNER voice to pull you up by your bootstraps and tell yourself that you were going to be okay (guilty, again, like looking at myself in the mirror). Have you ever wanted to go on a solo vacation, somewhere tropical? Have you ever worried about sharing your space with someone if you were married? Do breakups not even break you like they used to? Or maybe you’re in a space where you’re truly content with yourself and not even interested in a relationship right now? If any of these sound familiar, then it could be a sign that YOU are your person. 

How empowering is that? To know that you can stop searching for what you already have. It’s definitely less stressful, although perhaps not quite as romantic. But the idea of knowing that YOU have your own back. I feel like it’s a move that puts you in prime position if a romantic relationship does come along. 

When you already feel complete in life with yourself, then anyone that comes along is truly a supplement to the love you already have & give to yourself. When you’re your own soulmate, you wouldn’t dare let someone else come in and give you LESS than what you give yourself. When you’re your own soulmate, you don’t have expectations of someone else coming to save you or love you or shower you with affection. When you’re your own soulmate, you don’t have to depend on anyone else to make you make you happy. Of course, it would still be nice to have someone to be romantic and share life with, but even if they don’t show up, it’s good to know that I’m capable of loving myself enough for the both of us.

What are your thoughts? What are your thoughts on soulmates? Do you agree with the idea of self-soulmates?

Read More…

My Apology to The Other Woman

Instead of checking you on the phone that day, I should’ve checked myself.

Motherhood, Miscarriage & Me

By 35, I decided I didn’t want kids…until I found out I was pregnant.

An Open Letter to the Man of my Dreams

Dedicated to True Love.

Do You Believe in Soulmates?

When it comes to soulmates, are we allowed more than one in a lifetime?

5 thoughts on “Maybe…You’re Your OWN Soulmate

  1. Pingback: How Do You Know When You’ve Met “The One”? –

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  4. I think everyone has potentially three soul mates in this lifetime- God, themselves, and a mate, if it’s in the cards. If we get right with the first two, finding the third won’t be such a source of angst and discontentment.

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