Seeking a Sugar Daddy

Me: Looks up definition of sugar baby on Urban dictionary

Urban dictionary: Slut, whore, hoe, gold digging bitch who turns tricks for cash or sum like dat

Okay, not really, but that’s what I was prepared to see. In any case, I signed up for the dating site Seeking Arrangement!

Now if you haven’t heard of this site, it’s the premier dating site for Sugar Daddy & Sugar Baby…arrangements. Oh yes. 

I could lie and say I did it as research for…whatever, but nah. The truth is, I did this because I wanted to. Dating in your 30s is hard enough. If it’s not the quantity of available men (161.66M males compared to 166.58M females living in the US according to one source)…then it’s the quality. I decided that maybe dating for love is overrated. So I’m going to try my hand at dating for luxury. 

I first saw this site when I was home one day watching Wendy (cause ya’ll know I quit my job, right?) & she had Rachel Uchitel on her show. You may (or may not) remember Rachel as the woman the media dubbed as Tiger Wood’s mistress, you know when he had that little incident, uh, extramartial affair, back in ‘09. The actress/model was slandered in the media for being a homewrecker & has since gone on garner endorsements with many companies that include being the spokesperson for Seeking Arrangement, the premier online elite dating site for wealthy men.

When a friend cautiously inquired about my decision, I got the feeling that what they really wanted to know was, “So, are you going to sleep with men for money?” I assumed they were concerned about the obvious implication of me being labeled a hoe. 

Two things. 

First off, I don’t give a fuck about your labels. And two, most times when I’m in a relationship with someone, I sleep with them for free anyways. And in fact, the last time I had sex (almost a year ago) I wasn’t compensated at all for my time or my effort. I say that because the sex was trash. Okay, maybe not complete trash simply based on the fact that prior to us sleeping together, it had been well over a year then, since I last had sex, so hell yeah… if I get some this year, I’m going to make sure it’s worth it.

But if I’m honest, the site is not as sleazy as you might imagine it to be. Many of the men that I’ve encountered have standards of their own & are seeking an arrangement not based strictly on money or sex. Most of them claim to be looking for a “genuine connection” and have guidelines in their profiles, as well, that strictly warn against women who “only want money”.

There’s also a layer of security on the website via the background check that you can pay for to have your identity and background verified. There’s also the option to request a background check on your potential suitor. Additionally, the profile photos are legit. I know because I initially tried to grab a photo from online and pass it for my own but later received a message that my picture had been denied as “not able to authenticate”. Of course, the savvy criminal could get around that, I’m sure, but at least it gave me some comfort in knowing that if it didn’t work for me then hopefully the site has caught other people trying to catfish.

What I like is that the entire premise of this site is based on direct transparency. Everybody knows why they’re there. Categories for what kind of arrangement you seek include: fine dining, luxury travel and gifts, companionship & even mentorship, which I thought was pretty cool, considering that much of the clientele are millionaire entrepreneurs & business owners. I don’t know about you but being able to learn (get game, business advice) from a man is sexy in itself & could cause someone to become more attractive. So far, I’ve only chatted online but nothing more than that. In fact, when anyone has tried to move past the online arena, I’ve gotten cold feet & halted the process via a soft ghosting, lol, but…we’ll see. If I pop out on a yacht in Dubai, mind ya business is all I’m saying. Mind yo muhfuckin business. LOL.

What are your thoughts? Do you know anyone who’s had an arrangement? Would you ever consider doing it?

The Real Black Carrie Bradshaw

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4 thoughts on “Seeking a Sugar Daddy

  1. Right on! I’ve found sugar dating superior to conventional dating for exactly the reasons you describe– folks in the Sugar Bowl are transparent about their desires and what they have to offer. That stands in contrast to my experience in the conventional dating realm, where everyone seems to be looking to take as much as they can get for as little as they can give in return.

    As you put it: “most times when I’m in a relationship with someone, I sleep with them for free anyways. And in fact, the last time I had sex (almost a year ago) I wasn’t compensated at all for my time or my effort.”

    Well said!

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