Here’s Why Breakups Are Actually Good for You

At some point, we’ve all been through a bad breakup that left us feeling like we’d never get over the hurt. However there has been little research into what people experience after the dust settles and they’ve decided to move on. This blog will share research that aims to fill the void to help readers better understand what it’s really like after a major heartbreak and why breakups can actually be good for you.

Relationship dissolution, commonly referred to as a breakup, can be an emotionally trying process for those involved, but the idea that negative emotions can also provide a positive outcome is something we don’t often talk about. Recent research, however, has shown this is true, as well – so there’s actually good news that can follow a breakup.

Practitioners of positive thinking and manifestation understand this due to the fact that we know how our thoughts translate into feelings over time when done consistently. And manifesting a healthier you and a more productive life is possible.

A study on the effects of romantic dissolution and traumatic events has shown that they can lead to positive outcomes. It makes sense why some people feel like their life is taking a turn for the better after an unfulfilling relationship ends or a traumatic event such as divorce if individuals are helping themselves become better after going through something tough like a really bad breakup.

But here’s the good news about breakups:

Traumatic Events Can Promote Personal Growth

Positive growth is a cognitive process in which people actively strive to improve themselves. An example of post-traumatic positive psychological development would be an individual who has gone through some difficult experience and emerged on the other side stronger, more confident about their abilities or perspectives because they had been forced outside of what society typically expects from them. According to the study by Gary Lewandowski Jr and Nicole Bizzoco, results showed that growth can follow negative events and their growth tends to manifest itself in the form of lessons learned from the experience. Simply put, moving on from a bad relationship can spark positive changes such as furthering your education, starting a new business, or creating healthier lifestyle choices, both physically and emotionally.

Loss of Self

A common trigger that hinders individuals from moving on is the feeling of loss of self after a breakup. When you lose yourself in a relationship, it’s hard to know what your next move should be. If a person feels like they can’t recover from their breakup, then there will be no growth.

Rediscovery of Self

The rediscovery of the self might be one way to promote growth. By focusing on parts of your identity that may have been underdeveloped while in a relationship, you could potentially unlock new abilities and potentialities for yourself as an individual — a key component into experiencing positive change with regards to relationships.

Positive Emotions

It is possible that ending a low-quality relationship could be associated with more positive emotions and these feelings may inspire you in a new way. This could look like you pouring your energy into a good cause such as activism, volunteerism, or getting involved with a local cause to help someone else.


Research has found that the coping strategies involving positive reinterpretation and acceptance are positively correlated with growth following traumatic events. How you cope might affect your personal growth in ways you never knew —and it turns out there could actually be a link between those two things! Researchers have found – when someone copes well following a trauma or negative stressful event like a breakup–they lean towards positive thinking and increased emotional stability which lead them down paths toward greater self actualization than those who do not use these coping skills at all after recovering from major life events.

Breakups are tough. They can be so painful that it’s hard to see the silver lining of what might happen next, but if you take the time to look for them, they may just surprise you. Your breakup could lead to personal growth and rediscovery of yourself. You may even become more resilient as a result of your pain because you know how much worse things could have been had it not happened. So don’t give up on love! There’s light at the end of every tunnel – sometimes it takes some work before we’re able to find it though.

More Like This…

How to Get Over a Breakup

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30 Things to do After a Breakup

Devote at least one hour a day to heal from your breakup.

Confessions of a Breakup

Of all the women in the world you had to go and break her heart.

25 Things I’ve Learned From My Failed Relationships

Sometimes what we think is love, is actually a lesson.

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